Monday, March 26, 2007

Purity Ball!...See, it makes it's own jokes.

Bill Mahr, on Real Time, is the latest to come to notice these Purity, that name.

This is where dads get all prepped up in finery, daughters get in gowns, and they go to a prom of sorts. At the prom, dad gives daughter a ring, and she swears off sex until marriage.

Let's just call this what it is, an interim marriage agreement. Daughter pledges to love, honor, and obey (Dad says no sex, so no sex.) dad, until death (marriage).


So the Christian men's groups are getting to be more and more about being manly men of God (You know, He-Men, like Jesus.). And now they are expanding to marrying their daughters. You've come a long way Christianity. Good job.

But here is some of the earlier work on Purity Balls.

Daddy’s little hymen - The Dad Pledge
I, [daughter's name]'s father, choose before God to cover my daughter as her authority and protection in the area of purity. I will be pure in my own life as a man, husband and father. I will be a man of integrity and accountability as I lead, guide and pray over my daughter and as the high priest in my home. This covering will be used by God to influence generations to come.

Hot Live Purity Ball Action - video from a Colorado Purity Ball.

ABC News - Teen Girls 'Date' Dad, Pledge Purity - Purity Balls Include Big Night Out With White Cake and Vows, but No Groom
Even ABC News seems notice the creepy.

The event shares all the hallmarks of a wedding: Vows are exchanged, a white cake is served and there is even a first dance. But at the beginning of the event instead of fathers giving away their daughters' hand, they're holding on tight.

The event's purpose is to celebrate father-daughter bonding, but the main focus of the evening is for the fathers and daughters to exchange pledges in an elaborate ceremony. Fathers vow to protect the girls' chastity until they marry, and the daughters promise to remain abstinent.

"[In] today's day and age, if the daughters are sexually active before they're married that ceremony really is meaningless because the father's not giving anyone away," says Angela's father, Bret Merkle.

Yeah, it is not supposed to be all about dad. DUH! Originally, dad's giving away daughters was about the political or land deals. But since then, it is about your daughter getting together with someone she loves and she wants to be with. Not about you. Sorry.

"I'm going to stay pure until I'm married and I'm not going to date or kiss a boy," says 12-year-old Sarah Merkle.

"I saw so many young girls get hurt by the whole dating process," her father explains. "People are just chasing after instinct, chasing after their pleasures and desires and that's going to sting in the end."

So the deal is signed all is set, but would dad still bitch about the HPV vaccine, somehow I think it still threatens him...I mean his daughter, of course.

Young women and some young men sign virginity pledges at churches, rallies or programs sponsored by groups such as True Love Waits, and the movement is growing. This is partly fueled by government support. The current Bush administration's annual funding for abstinence initiatives has more than doubled to around $200 million.

Yeah, that works so well. What was the affect again? A massive increase in oral sex, wasn't it?

But critics say if these girls are only learning abstinence, they're not being taught important information about STDs and condoms.

"I could see it winding up in more teenage pregnancies and that type of thing because they don't know everything that they need to know," comments Deanne Keegan, a South Dakota mother who counsels youth at her local church.

And that is the real tragedy of this control and paranoia about knowledge. This kids go into the world plum stupid.

The study examined the sex lives of 12,000 adolescents and found teens who pledge to remain virgins until marriage have the same rates of sexually transmitted diseases as those who don't pledge abstinence.

But some fathers discount the studies, and think their relationship with their daughters will help them stay strong.

I don't want to dicount the value of a strong familial connection. It hepls. But it is not an end all, be all. Education is vital.

"We don't want them to be weird or to stand out in a bad way, but we believe with the right beliefs and attitudes … they can be different," Brett Merkle said. "There's lots of temptations in life and we're trying to teach our girls to be strong against those temptations and meet them with the appropriate behavior."

Yup. Cause it is all about daddy. Daddy will take care of it. Daddy will prevent it all. Girls don't need to know about STD's or other threats. Daddy's willpower will hold it all at bay.

Dads, you can't control them. You can't guarantee anything. Get them taught the science and health issues. Prep them, teach them, love them, and learn to trust and be there if things get rough for them. At some point you have to let go, and it really is not going to be when you hand them to another man to control.

THAT's being a DAD.

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