Sunday, October 20, 2013

Trailers in Short: Vampiric Edition: The Dark Prince, Fright Night Part 2, Embrace of the Vampire, AND MORE!

I have been noticing a number of trailers and movies out that center of vampires. Sadly, they are mostly unimpressive, based on their trailers. But maybe you'll disagree.

The Dark Prince

The Dark Prince looks to be "one of those" Dracula movies. He is a brutal warrior and defender, and then he's betrayed/failed and his beloved wife is killed. So, as you do, he gives himself to EVIL and becomes Dracula.

(Honestly, Francis Ford Copolla has done Frank Miller levels of damage to the Dracula mythos...Okay, to be fair, everyone who's followed Copolla and cribbed off him is the main culprit.)

And Dracula goes on a reign of terror.

So, a band of heroes rides in to take him out, years later. And among them is a woman, who "surprisingly" looks just like his long dead wife. The heroes have come seeking the "ultimate weapon", which will kill Dracula.

And so our heroes are beset by Dracula. By which I mean, his army. An army that Dracula has built, of some sort (vampire, ghouls, thralls). So, yes, we have medieval battles. Badly done medieval battles. This leads to the capture she who will remind him of his dead wife, and Dracula is enraptured, and starts questioning his unlife's path.

And, yeah, this looks really dull. We've seen this before. But..this is when the magic of bad movies comes alive in this trailer. Two things happen.

Jon Voight walks on screen. Leonardo Van Helsing. He has a bad wig. He has a fake nose. And a bad accent. Oh, my god! Is this the type of acting that Voight does exclusively now? What is this a Baby Geniuses prequel?

But, this trailer gets better. Somehow, they got the Game of Thrones theme music, and thought they'd plaster it over the rest of the trailer. And all I can think for the rest of the trailer is..."Why am I hearing Game of Thrones? And, why am I not watching Game of Thrones instead?"

Blending any bit of Game of Thrones with your bad movie leads to the bad movie getting rejected by the portion of Game of Thrones. It's science fact! I mean, even the Lord of the Rings music wouldn't feel as jarring.

But, still, how does the movie look? Dreadful.

Fright Night 2

This a Direct to DVD affair. And it confused a bit. Obviously we have the first two Fright Night movies that came out decades ago. Then we recently had a Fright Night remake. It moved the story and changed the background of Peter Vincent to that of a Las Vegas magician. We can talk about that movie another time.

But then we get to this movie. I would have assumed it was a sequel to that third movie. That it would following up with the characters next run in with vampires...Nope. It's more another remake..It's just another remake. But Peter Vincent looks to be back to being a TV show host.

But, man, it looks like a bad movie. It does have Jaime Murray, who can be a joy to see in a show. (And why isn't she starring in an H.G. Wells spin off on SyFy already?!) But this movie doesn't look like a joy to watch. The trailer makes the movie feel like a chore, so I can only imagine how bad the movie is.

How do you make a Fright Night sequel? Watch this trailer and see.

Embrace of the Vampire

A young shy fencer, straight out of a Catholic All Girls school, goes to college. And she's beset with visions. She is seeing death, blood, and sex. She's destined to be a vampire hunter.

Another Direct to DVD, it promises scantily clad women. blood. and naked women...Come on. Vampire movies can do better than this. Also, yes, this is a remake...of a 90's Alyssa Milano movie. Which means it's built on the corpse of another erotic thriller. I don't know if I should judge more lightly for that, or more harsher for not looking as interesting...Wait...I didn't find the first one that interesting or good either.

And, finally(!), a trailer for a good movie. It's for the new DVD release of Nosferatu. This will not be for everyone. It's a silent movie. It's a German movie. It's artistic. And it has subtitles...The silent movie part should have clued you into that. But if you like movies, either German or silent, or classic early horror, this may be a movie for you.

Of course there's the interesting history of how the movie got made, but that is better discussed in another post on this movie. The results of the effort though, a slightly tweaked version of the tale of Dracula, does deserve a some love from film fans and horror fans. And, it is Halloween. So dig up something very old to drag into the house.

Dracula: The Next TV Series

And on the less illustrious end, we have the coming series, Dracula, on NBC. (This is the latest ttempt to turn Dracula into a star.) This also tweaks the story of Dracula. And shifts things around. But what should I make of it. The first trailer for the series had it's flaws. But the idea that Dracula would land in Victorian London, and decide to set himself up as an industrialist and eager proponent of new technology is interesting. And if he actually wanted to change things and choose another path, it could be interesting. Also the fact he's fighting another faction of vampires (I think), who want him gone is fun.

But then you get into all the stuff that cut sliced out of Francis Ford Coppola's Bram Stoker's Dracula and dumped into this show... Of course, what's amusing to me that when you do this blending with Dracula, he turns into a murderous blood soaked Jay Gatsby.

...Maybe Gatsby was a vampire! How have we gotten repeated Jane Austen-turned-Horror books, and not that yet! People! Really?

But then we get to the second trailer. And the whole endeavor starts looking like a mix of silly and plain dumb. I like the female monster hunter. Yet, she's also involved with Dracula?  Overall, it is starting to feel oh so ridiculous.

This could well burst into flames and disappear when it sees the light of day. But I suppose I need to take a look at it.

But, as far as TV, what I really am really looking forward to is Only Human, with Karl Urban...But this post is about Vampires, not droids.

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